Cover him in chocolate chips and bake at 350C for 15 minutes

Fucking delicious. Did our Goalie Corbeil REALLY just get a goal only 0:00 seconds into the game? How is this even possible? Is it a QMJHL stat-sheet error?

If it is not a stat-sheet error then the boy should be immortalized as a cookie - a cookie which shall be eaten by me. Right now. Because I am still at work and I am f'n starving.

Oh. The goal is now gone (it was that fast). Boooo. But, let it be known that for a brief period of time, on Thurs Dec 17*, 2009, Mathieu Corbeil, Mooseheads goaltender, was credited with a totally impossible goal.

* I am very bad with dates

Please take note

PEI are updating their website. I made a post a long long time ago about why the Mooseheads website sucks...and how our team promotions suck. I had started a post on how the promotional team can improve the website but never finished because I was lazy and it required more work than simply telling boys to lick me.

This is what PEI will be doing:

· “This is my Civic Centre” rotating promo videos – every time you visit the PEI Rocket website, you will be greeted by a new video of one of the Rocket Players in their creative “This is my Civic Centre” videos.

· Next Game Videos – For every upcoming home game, we will have a message from a Rocket player promoting each upcoming game and any important special events associated with each game.

· Last Game Video Highlights – complete with audio from Corey Arsenault, each game will features highlights that will be shown on the website shortly after each home game.

In the very near future, additional video components will be added that will include:

· Player Profile Videos – designed to allow fans to get to know the players. These are 2-3 minute vignettes of each of our players that are currently shown at home games between periods.

· Introduction Videos – each player has a very brief intro video highlighting their name, number, position and hometown.

We want the website to be a place where our fans can be kept up to date on anything that is happening with the PEI Rocket. Although many new additions have been added to the site, the old favorites are still there as well, including.

· Launchpad E-Newsletter signup

· Player Appearance Program request form

· News Section

· Information on all of the Rocket players

· And much more…

PEI PEOPLE!!! It is a sad day when PEI are one-upping us; and have you seen the Eagles website? It is magnificently beautiful. The boy in the background changes all the time. Moncton have a blog as well as a history record for all players...what an ingenious idea. The Mooseheads could have done this to help celebrate players from the past 15 years, you know, for the great 15th season promotion.

They are promoting their players...because when you can't promote a win, then you turn to the next best thing - the shiny young dreamy things that play the game. Fucking brilliant. I want to watch porno videos of my players - oops, I mean promo videos.

We haven't even updated our videos since last year.

Who the fuck is Bryce Swan? What is a Voracek? I see no Voraceks on the roster! YouTube wha? RSS feed - that is crazy talk!!! I can't take naughty cell phone pictures. I am old... I can't deal with this shit!!!


edit - Holy crap- you can get PEI player posters for your bedroom wall people. Not my thing, but still... I have no goalies to kiss when I go to bed. Come to think of it, I need to buy a Nadeau 11x17 poster stat!

Gerrad Grant has "a body like a model"/ I feel shame.

This post has little to do with hockey and more to do with hockey players. As such I will get the nitty gritty out of the way and let the world know that the Mooseheads lost to the Acadie-Bathurst Titan by a score of 6-4. Mooseheads had the lead three times (2-1, 3-2, 4-3)...and just kept losing it.

For a guy who takes pride in his butterfly stylin' Mark Yetman has a very slutty 5 hole. As I was saying to a friend, Yetman only played well in Moncton because the Wildcats provided him with appropriate pre-game meal of kittey food. That is what cats eat. When he came home and got some of that homemade Mac and Cheese he so likes, it fucked him up, because kittey's should be eating kittey food.

Everything you need to know about the game you can learn by checking out the QMJHL game summary, or Matthew Wuest's lineups (Linden Bahm out HEALTHY, why I NEVER!!!) and game notes.


But this post is not about hockey. This post is about the arrogance of some boys who play hockey. I am going to use curse words. Children - go away NOW. This post is not for you.

Are you gone yet? Good!!!


Every home game we get a game program; the program includes an interview with a player. Today's player was Gerrad Grant (#22). I know I have gone here before but let me continue. One of the questions is "Finish this sentence: I'd be a billionaire if I had a dollar every time some one said..." Gerrad Grant answered "I have the body of a model".

Dude. Fuck Off.

You are an athlete. If you don't have a good body you are fucked. I automatically assume most boys who play hockey have a body that is better than the norm, but to brag about it is just arrogant. Have it ...be humble. What your mother tells you and the puck bunnies tell you DOES NOT COUNT.

Assholes are not hot. Much like how boys will fuck girls and think those girls are twits, there are girls who will fuck boys and then laugh with their friends about what an idiot that guy was. All the girls know. All the girls laugh. DUDES...GIRLS TALK A LOT. Also, girls USE guys. Then we call you stupid and laugh at you. Heterosexual females like male bodies, but to tell you the truth that is all there is to most of you. Bodies. Especially young selfish guys like junior hockey players.

Being an arrogant asshole is not hot

You think you are attractive when you are not. You think you are good in bed because lots of girls will let you fuck them. Just because puck bunnies are chasing after you or using you for your body it does not mean you are hot, nice, worth any girl's actual time and effort, intelligent, a good conversationalist, nor does it mean you are particularly good in bed. One problem is your choice of female companion. Seventeen year old hos from Cole Harbour don't know what "good in bed" means. Nor do you. Just because she made sounds it does not mean she is satisfied. It does not mean you are king of the bedroom. Fuck, most of the time you barely qualify to be court jester on the ice.


Ahhhhh

So because Mark Yetman and Gerrad Grant exhaused themselves before the game with their jerking off - Mark to his "good looking" face, Gerrad to his "model's body", they gave the Titan a chance to win. Brav-a-muther-fuckin-O.

May I just say, as a spokesperson for the vast majority of the female population: shut up. You are behaving like idiots. You may be cool now but junior hockey will end for you sooner than you think. Real life is not at all like "keys to the VIP".

PS. You know who actually is hot. Tomy Joly (to your right): Strong chin, good smile, pleasant eyes, delectable eyebrows. But just because I think he is good looking he shouldn't let it go to his head...especially since he is practically a midget. Hey, we all have faults.

Hmmmmmmmm, What up Corsi?

Wha?
Despite previous reports (Friday, August 1st) that 20 year old former Mooseheads Centreman PJ Corsi had signed a contract with the Charlotte Checkers, an ECHL affiliate of the NY Rangers, an article from Drummondville newspaper L'express (published August 2nd) actually denies these reports.

According to L'express, while Corsi's camp concedes that talks with the Checkers are very advanced, the truth remains that as of August 2nd he had not yet signed with them. This is because his main focus is to secure a place at an upcoming NHL training camp. His interest is not to play exclusively in the ECHL, but to instead play for an organization that can offer him a contract linked to the AHL or NHL.

Apparently Corsi has had plenty of offers from the likes of Tampa Bay and Pittsburgh affiliates, but because they could not offer him a place at their NHL or AHL training camps he has turned them down. The Rangers, however, have at least guaranteed him a spot at the Hartford Wolfpack training camp. No contracts have yet been signed because the Rangers cannot guarantee Corsi a try out with the big club.

Also, if Corsi fails to report to Drummondville due to acquiring a professional contract, the Mooseheads will owe the Voltigeurs some compensation. When we originally traded Corsi this year at the draft (to complete the Bouchard trade at Christmas) it was for 3rd, 4th and 7th round draft picks in 2008 and a 4th in 2009.

Damn, are we not already screwed enough? We are beyond sore!!! It appears as if we will owe them 2 future draft picks should PJ actually fail to report to Drummondville.