Superseries

The Roster for the QMJHL team in the Canada /Russia superseries has been announced and it has some seriously serious goaltenders on it.

International exposure is a great thing.

Goaltenders

Jake Allen (MTL)
Maxime Clermont (GAT)
Louis Domingue (MON)
Olivier Roy (CAP)

Defensemen

Mark Barberio (MON)
Nicolas Deslauriers (ROU)
Simon Després (SNB)
Brandon Gormley (MON)
Hubert Labrie (GAT)
Charles-Olivier Roussel (SHA)
Yann Sauvé (SNB)
David Savard (MON)
Marco Scandella (VDO)

Forwards

Luke Adam (CAP)
Michaël Bournival (SHA)
Gabriel Bourque (BAC)
Jordan Caron (RIM)
Patrice Cormier (RIM)
Philippe Cornet (ROU)
Sean Couturier (DRU)
Nicolas Deschamps (CHI)
Gabriel Dumont (DRU)
Michael Kirkpatrick (SNB)
Jacob Lagacé (CHI)
Philippe Paradis (SHA)
Maxime Sauvé (VDO)
Kelsey Tessier (QUE)
Marc-Olivier Vachon (DRU)

The only thing it is missing are Mooseheads players. *sigh*

Ein Augustinerbrau, bitte.

Dearest Konrad

We must celebrate. A toast to Germany. Proust!

Q-girl

Re. the Euro draft

Ok that was a start. The blog has been a little slow going because I am out of province. I am currently in Igloolik Nunavut on a rationed internet feed. It is about 3100 km from Halifax to Igloolik. It is about 5550 km to Bad Tolz Germany, home of our new Euro draft pick Konrad Abeltshauser. Thus I am still closer than Konrad.

Mr Abeltshauser is a bold new departure for the Moose. Really, like, he is not Czech! When was the last time my team had a non-Czech Euro?

The Moose picked Abeltshauser with the 28^th overall pick, which they received from Cape Breton in a little trade.

I have been in discussions with my German friend, and future wife of Steve Lund (the game worn jersey gives her dibs) CG, and am now convinced that the Mooseheads have picked Abeltshauser, a Bavarian, for the sole purpose of wooing her back to Halifax. If she has a favorite thing in hockey it is 6’3” defencemen; and if she has a favorite thing in men it is tall Bavarians who can handle their Bier.

If you need to know more just read Matthew Wuest’s blog post. Ohhh it has an updated depth chart. I will file that in my brain under “stupid things I need to know”. It is right up there with “if glia of the fruitfly cannot engage in endocytosis, that fly will die with in 3 days”.

Perhaps I will nickname him " the kaiser". I have to go practice my German now.

Re. The NHL draft:

I am very disappointed by the NHL for failing to recognize talent where they see it. Olivier Roy – 5^th round…and to Edmonton. Bah humbug! Sorry kiddo.

…and really New Jersey! Ashton Bernard! I should dump your ass for that one.

Unfortunately, Gabe (the First) got passed over, even though he has more skills than just fighting. Often boys get passed over and their true potential is not realized until they are older. People who watch Jr hockey once a year (you know, at New Years) have no clue what is really available out there. They hear stuff, but they don’t know what these kids actually play like. Then they pretend they know because they read a few scouting reports. Hooey! Sometimes there is bandwagoning for or against a player. That is also hooey.

Often boys get passed over and it doesn’t even mean they were a "slow developer". Nicola Riopel was never slow, he was simply just not favored. He is good, but his team is good defensively and so maybe people doubted him because of it. Philly made a good, albeit boring, choice with Riopel. I mean, he is no Emery or Biron or Hextall, but he is serviceable and would likely make a good husband. There is something decidedly un-Philly like about this pick. They made up for it by acquiring Pronger and Emery. I guess they wanted a little sweet to go with their sour.

I am pissed at Pittsburg for once again selecting one of my favorite players in the Q by choosing Simon Despres with the 30^th overall pick. My boyfriend has recommended that I should just be a scout for Pittsburgh since they take all of my favorite fucking players. How the hell am I supposed to hate them when / if they have Talbot, Letang, Despres, Veilleux, and Grant (and maybe just maybe Zach Sill) on their roster. I didn’t always hate MAF you know! There was a time….before he was a Penguin. I swear to God! The Penguin’s scouts are reading my blog and plotting their next move against me.

New news is good news

I have Hoorays and Neighs to hand out on this miserable, rainy, Tuesday morning.

Hoorays:
We all know that former Mooseheads overagers Mark Yetman and Graham Bona are university bound next season, but what of defenceman Justin Pender? It seems as if, after years of being incapable of worming his way into my heart as a Moosehead, the big lug took the next logical step - the Devil's organization.

Uggg! A Pender/ White/ Yetman tallindering would be the most newfiefied and terrifying sex act in the world and I don't want to go there Pender. I DO NOT. I saw a picture once and it looked violent and scary. I don't want to be in the middle of THAT. I don't want to mess my hair and we just know that you are all a bunch of hair pullers.

Yes, Pender is trying his hand at worming his way onto the Debils from training camp and worse yet worming his way into my heart/pants. He finished off last season playing two games with the AHL's Lowell Devils, getting two points in 2 games. It was all sorts of impressive.

According to Wuest, this is Pender's new life philosophy

Pender hopes to secure an AHL contract with Lowell but would report to the club’s East Coast Hockey League affiliate, the Trenton Devils, if that didn’t pan out.

“That’s how my mind is set right now, unless something else comes up,” the six-foot-four 212-pounder said. Pender, who was the Mooseheads’ top-scoring defenceman last season with nine goals and 26 assists for 35 points and 104 penalty minutes in 61 games, said his AHL stint went well last season.

“I found it a lot easier than the Q,” he said. “The players knew what they were doing, they were a lot quicker, a lot faster pace. As soon as you have the puck, you can move it.”

Ohhh la-ti-da! Now players in the AHL are better than my stinky rotting Moose carcasses are they? They make you better do they Pender? Oh wait - yes they are. Sorry. Carry on!


Neighs:
1) I went to the ball hockey tournament to watch my boyfriend play a game. I was hoping to catch a little Moose action on the side. Well not only was my boyfriend's team a total bomb but my Moosie's game vs the Wildcats was canceled due to time constraints. What the fuck is that PlayON? No. I don't need to say more!


2) Ahem QMJHL! If I knew your middle name I would use it right now. I would be all like "Quebec Thomas Major-Junior-Hockey-League you get over here THIS INSTANT". I would get all MOM on your ass.

This picture of Olivier Bellavance-Roy looks tres familiar, n'est pas? Don't you have a more legal means of picture acquisition? I am sure the Eagles have tonnes of pictures of our dearest Olivier that you can use. When I use other people's pics I give them credit. I think it is the nice thing to do.

Anywho...do you know that 16 teams were taking a good hard look at Oliver during the combine? One of those teams was the Debils! mmmm Debils.

Never mind the bollocks

I know, I know! I never write, I never call, heck I don't even PM. I leave you at home weeping into your keyboard and wondering if I will ever type the words blow job ever again. For my absence I am sorry. I have a little thing called a job (is a PhD a job?) and it has silly things like deadlines and pressures. Since today is a sunny day and I am involved in a vast conspiracy for slacking off while drinking beers on the rooftop of 'Your Father's Moustache' this afternoon, I figured I could also take a little time to slack in advance.

Moose news? What is that? Admittedly my post draft rants have been slow coming and I never listed all of our new draftees. It is with open arms I welcome following boys into the fold. No, they can't nuzzle into my boobies quite yet. I need to see them in a jersey first.

Round 1( #15)
Brent Andrews 1993-01-19 6'1" 183

Round 2 (#19)
Jamie Bishop 1993-03-14 6'0" 168

Round 3 (#49)
Matthew Boudreau 1993-03-09 5'8" 149

Round 4 (#67)
Trey Lewis 1993-05-31 5'11" 170

Round 4 (#72)
Carl Gélinas 1992-02-06 5'11" 172

Round 6 (#106)
Sawyer Hannay 1992-09-06 6'3" 190

Round 9 (#145)
Joel Grondin 1992-02-27 6'1" 192

Round 10 (#163)
Brett Bernard 1992-02-24 5'11" 170

Round 11 (#181 )
Steve Gillard 1992-02-01 5'10" 184

Round 12 (#197)
Kody Orr 1992-10-11 6'0" 170

I know nothing about these boys (except we drafted a lot of guys who want to go NCAA) but on draft weekend Matthew Wuest had a lot of coverage and so I will direct you to him. His pick by pick coverage is excellent except he fails to provide info on who the little hotties are. I suggest you stick with reading his stuff because he is all in the know and likely hasn't offered anyone a blowjob for information recently. This means he is legit. Me? Not so much!

Today you can read a post about our first round pick Brett Andrews. Andrews is still not sure if he wants to report and I am making angry fists in his general direction until he decides to come here.

“We’re not sure yet. We’re in discussions,” Andrews, 16, told the Charlottetown Guardian from his home in Hunter River, P.E.I. “It was a pretty big surprise. I didn’t expect them to pick me that high.”

May I also recommend Wuest's twitter feed?

The Moose are getting with the times:
The Mooseheads have also started a twitter feed and it is making me feel all tingly in my nethers. The next step may be a website overhaul. I mean really guys - get on it! They also had game announcer John Moore write about the draft. Maybe they can actually get around to getting him a real blog page like the Wildcats did with Les Stoodley. Not that I want to be pushed to the edge of the Moose blog-o-verse by a bunch of team sanctioned legits. I wish that blogging would get me free season tickets. Wouldn't that be nice?

The Moose used their twitter to show me this:

I mean, look at this fancy shnazmatazz (not a word)!!! This is Gabe the 2nd (now, Gabe the only) wearing our new jersey. The team put a picture up on their website but quickly removed it. I have yet to see a picture of the new uniform in full.

I just have one complaint. I know Gabe is pretty and all, and he is one of the few boys still around since he is going to school in Halifax, but dearest team - you must use more than one player for promotions. I hope to see more varied and different faces on promotional materials. 4th line players are still Mooseheads, ya' know! I need a little more MacDonald mullett in my life.

Ball hockey:
The CBC Play-On Ball Hockey tournament is taking place on the Halifax Commons this weekend. The Mooseheads will be playing a game against the Moncton Wildcats. I wonder if Gabe the 1st (now, Gabe the Huskie) will be playing or if he has been disowned by our ball hockey team as well. Will Brent Andrews lose his NCAA eligibility if he takes Gabe's place on the ball hockey team?

I will be there - but only because I will be acting as cheerleader, fluffer and trainer for my boyfriend...or at least that is what I will tell him. I may skulk over to the Mooseheads game and get my drool on.

Wuests' next big three:
Matthew Wuest has also updated his Q-flies to discuss three players that he thinks will have an impact next year. Included on the list are Gerrad "model's body" Grant*, Jessyko "puppy" Bernard, and Pascal "I don't have a nickname for him yet" Amyot.

This is what he has to say about Jessyko:

For a 20-game stretch last year, Bernard was scoring at a point-per-game pace on the top line with Tomas Knotek. Then he disappeared. But at 18, he'll be asked to take on a scoring-line role and has size and hands to rise to the occasion.

Wonderful. We like to blame Jessyko's lost production on a series of injuries/aggravated injuries during the second half. I have huge faith is Jessyko. Why didn't I bid on that Bernard limited edition V's Jersey? Blame the goalie!

Anyway, the point I want to make is not about the praise - it is about the dis below. Why do we let people comment in the newspaper? If they want a voice they can get a blog like me and then people can choose to read it or not to read it.

Newspaper comments bombard me with idiocy - I hate them. Metro reader Sonny says "Bernard would have to be in a lot better shape that he was to have a breakout season, his stamina was very low also he has to lose his hot dog attitude ( as in no more between period interviews, please)"

Sonny is clearly on crack. Jessyko's intermission interviews were the one thing I actually had to look forward to at last year's games. I want to see more singing, more fancy suits, more stylin' glasses, more luxurious mullet growth and the pimpin'est shoes - faux snakeskin perhaps. I wonder if he can dance in his blades? Hmmmmm? I think he should definitely give that a try. Never mind the bollocks, Jessyko.

NHL Draft:
I could compile a list of players from the Q who are expected to go in this years draft. If I am feeling like science is bogging me down I might just do it....or I might just opt for what I have been doing during my downtime all week - lapsing into a vegetative state on the sofa. I hope that Simon Despres and Olivier Roy get their just placements in the draft. I think it is about time the Devils drafted a new young goalie with a high pick. I also wish Gabriel O'Connor good luck with the draft and I really really hope that he has caught the eye of at least one NHL team who is willing to give him a chance.

Goalies:
Olivier Roy (Cape Breton) and Jake Allen (Montreal) have been invited to the Hockey Canada's national junior development camp in August. Congrats to the boys. I lubs me some goalie. I especially lubs me my Q- goalies. I am glad we will have two goalies reppin' the Q this year.

*Sweetie - I am NEVER going to let you live that down.

Good News/ Bad News/ Circular rantings

Today is Monday. Everybody hates Monday. I hate Monday because I just found out that the Sea Dogs have traded 20 year old defensive forward Francois Gauthier to the Val d'Or Foreurs. I am now in a very pissy mood. This clears up a place for another 20 year old on the Sea Dogs roster. The big question now is which 20YO are the Sea Dogs looking to pick up?

Mondays also mean that the QMJHL have announced their players of the week and Sportsnet has put out its hot/not list.

Let’s start with the good news:

Everybody’s baby boyfriend Olivier Roy (he has all the girl bloggers cooing) of the Cape Breton Screaming Eagles is the QMJHL defensive player of the week. So far this season Olivier has had 7 starts with no losses. This past weekend he had two wins over the Lewiston Maineiacs (including a 5-0 shutout) coming out with a 1.0 GAA and 0.961 save %. Sportsnet is also currently running a feature on Olivier Bellavance-Roy.

If you are going to build a fenced-in area it has to be used for something very special. I am going to build a small fenced-in area and put Olivier in it. I do not want those nasty Cape Breton skanks putting their hands on his preciousness. I hope he manages to leave Cape Breton and the Q in an STD free state.

Also rans include Drew Paris (Defence – Titan), TJ Brennan (Defence – Montreal) and Charles Lavigne (Goaltending – Remparts).

Does anybody remember when Charlie got traded from Moncton to the Quebec Remparts and everybody boo-booed the trade saying that my pokey Charlie could not hack it on a contending team because he was not such a good goalie. They said that he would simply be used for trade at X-mas. Man those people suck ‘eh. The folks of Moncton, and I, and probably Charlie’s parents were all NUTS TO YOU JERKS. It turns out that we were right. All Charlie really needed was a better team in front of him. He has skillz. That was never the issue. Lavigne currently has 5 wins, 1 loss a 2.14 GAA and .927 save %. I will now purr at Charles Lavigne and knead this former Wildcat like a kitty. That will be his prize.

There is really no way of explaining why Jonathan Roy is also doing well backstopping the same team. I assume in his case it is just fluke.

Ummmm – the hard part

Sportsnet has also announced its hot and cold players/teams of the week. The QMJHL cold player for the week is Mark Yetman. Ouch. They even take the time to point out that he could very well lose his job if he keeps it up with the low caliber of his play. Double ouch.

It is one thing when I say it; it is completely another when it is shouted out on a national sports website. Mark currently has one win, seven losses, a 3.98 and 0.838 save % for the season. This weekend he allowed 11 goals on 49 shots – he basically stopped only 1 in every 4 shots on net.

Mr Yetman may need to take his brain and place it firmly back in his cranium where it is most useful for coordinating the motor response to a visual stimulus. I fear that sometimes he (like many a Junior hockey player and average young man) keeps his brain stored someplace much less useful. That being said, it is so easy to blame the goalie (even one with an occasionally misplaced cortex). I, like many others, have to remember that while Mark’s performance thus far this season has been underwhelming, he is a real human boy with real human boy thoughts and feelings. I constantly afforded sympathies and respect to Pier when his performance was underwhelming, so why do I have a hard time doing it with Mark?*

This is not professional hockey, it is junior hockey, a development league even, and Mark (or Mathieu) is not only still developing but he has thirteen*** rookies in front of him (and quite possibly an incompetent coaching staff behind him). Admittedly, some rookie goalies (ahem, OBR) have managed to do much better under similar circumstances, but those goalies were touched by God and also play for a team which may be competently coached.

I am going to go hunt down our netminders now and hold them reassuringly tight to my bosom. Yetman will be nuzzled into my chestful of warm embrace and all I will hear are some mufflings about my having to buy a 15 game pack**…then something about a big stick. Oh sweety, I already have a 15 game pack and all of the associated privileges. Thanks though. Now what were you saying about a big stick?

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*I actually know the answer to this question, but refuse to say it here.

** Seriously, the in-game promo ads are very 'dur'. Why choose Mark to do them and not Logan? Dullardry! Mark is too wooden (that’s what she said). It could be worse; it could be IR Pender or IR Cheremetiev – we must be saving Yuri for next season. At least Mark doesn’t sound stupid.

***Mistake, I blame it on the Q website. We have 14 rookies: 13 skaters 1 goaltender. Snow, Earle and Chisholm are not listed as rookies on the Q Mooseheads page.

Team White, Team Red ... and Jakub Voracek?

Hockey Canada has posted the results for the 1st Team Canada under 18 scrimmage taking place at their training camp in Calgary. Team White defeated team Red 2-0. My chubbycheeked cuddlebunny Maxime Clermont (Gatineau) allowed the only goal of the game, the other was an empty netter.

Who were the glorious goaltenders to get that shutout: that's right! our boy Olivier Roy (Screaming Eagles) and some young west coast chap named Nathan Lieuwen (Westside - BCHL).

While I am on an OliRoy roll I am just going to post an old you tube video of an Eagles vs Wildcats game from the 2007-2008 season. At about 6:00 into the video Nicolas Chouinard interviews his teammate Olivier about his recent shutout performance en Francais. They switch to English at about 8:00 into the video.



Don't tell me that you do not want to take Olivier Roy home, tie him to a chair in your kitchen, and force feed him cookies. Without the playoff skullet HE IS ADORABLE...and this is coming from a Mooseheads fan - sworn mortal enemy of the Eagles, or at least I should be were I not from Cape Breton. For you see I am a Moose convert - a traitor. I can't go home. They will gouge out my eyes.

There is still a fleck of Eagle love in my heart (lodged near one of my valves - if it is removed I might die) which persists because that team plays with so much grit and intensity that they make it difficult not to love them. But when you live with 25 Moose, who are so sweet and cuddly soft, it is difficult not to love them as well.

Anyway, back to Hockey Canada: The Victorious team White features Mooseheads forward Old Man Randell, David Gilbert (Quebec Remparts), Matthew Brown (Moncton), Gleason Fournier (Rimouski) and Mikael Tam (Quebec).

Team Red features Simon Després (Saint John), Hubert Labrie (Gatineau), Yeti Jr. (Shawinigan), and Steven Anthony (Saint John).

What did our glorious Q players do? I have no idea! All I can say is that the Q-boys combined for no goals, no assists and not even a single penalty. I guess that taking no penalties is good!


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Hockeyscene.com has a feature on Mooseheads winger and 2007 BlueJackets 1st round draft pick Jakub Voracek. While I love to copy and paste everything here - I will instead refer you to the Hockey Scene website.

It would seem that the Blue Jackets are taking very serious look at keeping Jakub even though he will only be 19 this season. They say his main weakness is his reluctance to shoot, preferring instead to use his remarkable vision to act as a playmaker.

If you got a goalie, yo I'll blog it

Every year Hockey Canada holds a "how to please Q-girl" camp for 12 young goalies. Of course, they don't call it that because it would upset the parents of the young goalies, instead they call it Hockey Canada’s Program of Excellence camp. Three boys from the Q are invited including Cape Breton Screaming Eagles goalie Olivier Roy, Jake Allen of the Junior de Montreal (it is so hard to type that, can't I just keep pretending the Fog Devils still exist), and my cuddling partner Maxime Clermont of the Gatineau Olympiques.

Olivier Bellavance-Roy will make you see glove saves in your sleep

Other boys invited include: Nathan Lieuwen (Kootenay Ice), Bryce O’Hagan (Sault Ste. Marie Greyhounds), Tyler Beskorowany (Owen Sound), Chris Carrozzi (Mississauga), Mike Murphy (Belleville), Chet Pickard (Tri-City), Tyson Sexsmith (Vancouver), Steven Stanford (Prince Albert) and Dustin Tokarski (Spokane).

The best part is the fact that they herd all of the young goalies into one building for me. It is entrapment at its finest. I am sure the film crew from NBC's "to catch a predator" will be there. Now, where is my ticket to Calgary?

I think I must get 5 hits a day because of people searching for Jake Allen Goalie. Hits from strange places like Tennessee and Kansas and stuff. Jake is very popular. I am sorry if Nashville is hunting for his ass.

Also, when it comes to building my small goalie army, may I just say - 1 down, 9 to go. HA!

I must also send out huge CONGRATS to former Screaming Eagles goalie Ondrej Pavelec of the Chicago Wolves. The Chicago Wolves have won the AHL Calder Cup. They defeated the WBS Penguins in 6 games. Pavelec played 24 games and posted a 2.34 GAA and 0.921 save % for this playoff run. Oh Ondrej, you were my #1 non-Mooseheads Q-goalie boyfriend of 2006-2007 and my heart still belongs to thee, you know that right? I am just realizing that boyfriend turnover in this league is exceptionally high and I must look like a huge goalie loving skank.

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So I am walking around my block yesterday morning with my dog, just minding my own business, when I think I see Sydney native Chris Culligan, new captain of the Screaming Eagles. Then I think pffff, that is not Cully because he does not live in Halifax and I go on with my day. Later in the day I am checking the local news when I find an article on James Sheppard of the Minnesota Wild. It says that James is no longer living in Lower Sackville with his ma and pa, but that he is instead living in Halifax for the summer with two roomates, one of which is Chris Culligan. Does this mean that Chris Culligan and James Sheppard live in my neighbourhood? If so - too awesome.

Mooseheads vs Eagles: Game 5 - real tears were shed

In what was a seemingly equally well played game, Halifax managed to net a big point differential, pulling out 2 empty net goals in the last minute of play to defeat the Cape Breton Screaming Eagles 5-2 and bring this series to a close. Wuest's blog transcript has all the details on how the Mooseheads win the Battle of Nova Scotia.

Cape Breton must have taken crying lessons from Jonathan Bernier back when Lewiston lost in Sydney. The waterworks were really flowing – Brodeur was a sweet little mess. Mad props to the Capers for giving us some hard fought games, and for displaying such loyalty to each other and to their captain. They seem like a tight crew, which they would have to be to all agree on that ridiculous ‘do’.

Halifax will carry on to round 3 and face Squirrels and the Olympiques. It will also be a battle of Newfy netminders. Actually, now that I think of it only 1 francophone remains among the starting goaltenders, and for all of the Gougeon bashing I do (because he has the doucheiest facial hair and he is short so he looks like he is wearing his mommy’s gear), he has really impressive post season numbers. Never mind that Rouyn Noranda swept both series they have played so far. He currently leads the league in playoffs with a 1.76 GAA and 0.944 save %.

Pier chewed gum and waved at the people while looking very uncomfortable as he was wished ‘happy birthday’. The MC forgot Bouchard’s birthday even though game day (April 11 – happy belated birthday) was his actual birthday. I think P-O’s discomfort in front of the camera stems from shame over that hideous playoff growth on his face. While I am obsessed with his beauty I find the face hair totally skeezy. It doesn’t work for everyone. Jonathan Bernier’s handlebar moustache was better than Pier’s patchy attempt at…what is that - random growth, a chinstrap, massive sideburns? I can’t tell. I fear that my affection is beginning to wain. I can’t just like a goalie for how they look, despite how it may seem…I am really not that shallow. They need to be pounded by pucks, standing in blue ice, being acrobatic, getting sweaty and wearing the helmet for me to thoroughly get my ‘sigh’ on. Maybe if I make it to the game early to catch him in warm ups with the helmet on and stopping the occasional puck my love will be invigorated.

In other goalies that were actually playing news, Mark was excellently boring again: position, stop puck, position, stop puck, do not play the puck, get back into position….stop puck. Yeti stopped 30 of 32 pucks thrown his way and as such was awarded 1^st star of the game. He had a very nice glove save at some point but the power of Yeti’s glove save is far outweighed by the power of Olivier Roy’s awesomea glove saves. No more wasting shots on net by going glove side on this kid, it is virtually useless. Remember this for next season.

Roy managed to block 33 of 36 shots from entering the net and was awarded 3^rd star. I am sure I will eventually grow to love him, his trooper like nature when injured (his own man skated into his head when he was down on the puck- owwww), his weird puck throwing ways, and his pouty lip. It would just be too obscene right now given that he is still only 16 years old (but still manages to grow a better beard than Pier).

Logan MacMillan finally got a goal. No really, finally... I feel I have been waiting forever for that one. Ryan Hillier was the machine of the night with two goals including the game winner while Pridham secured the game with an empty net goal. Marchand then super secured the game with another ENG with 1 second remaining on the clock. Both of Cape Breton’s markers were put in by “A for results” Chris Culligan with assists by Slaney and Ouellet.

Halifax took 6 penalties, allowing Cape Breton two 5 on 3 PP opportunities. What is unusual is that Andrew White was actually assessed two minor penalties. White does not normally take penalties. During his 64 regular season games he had 29 PIM. Only Knotek (18 PIM) and Pridham (28 PIM) took less penalties.

Once in the box Whitey put on his ‘I am going to kill you now eyes’ and exclaimed “holy fuck……fuck (something)”. It was actually kinda cute, but I am biased because I like him, his good positioning, his hard work ethic and his shifty ‘I am going to kill you now’ eyes so much. I like him more with every passing day, and there is no real excuse for this exponential growth in affection. They left him in the box and threw Logan in there with him and inside the box became very angry and full of dirty looks and “holy fuck” combined with “fuck this” faces. The box is probably now haunted by the spirits of two very angry boys.

I actually had a dream featuring Andrew once, and in my dream he was a total…mmmm how to put this delicately…ass, and yet it only made me like him more. I came out of it thinking 'mmmmm saucy'.

Oh, and remember how I said I cursed the answer to the question “steak or sushi”, well I actually cursed the question. Bryce Swan, who was out of the game with a concussion was Shannon’s guest for ‘the quick card minute’ and this was his second time doing 10 questions, so she asked him some new questions which did not include the steak question. Yes my jinxing powers are just that strong.

Working in small spaces down low

Well isn’t that wonderfully dirty hockey terminology - "Working in small spaces down low". I am going to make sure I work it into all of my regular conversations from here on in. I heard it directly from the mouth of the Sea Dogs play-by-play commentator. We will leave all of my dirty thoughts re. "working in small spaces down low" targeted toward a certain Sea Dog. Dirty thoughts are not for my Moose – they get cuddles, soft caresses, nuzzles and kisses on the forehead, or cookies and ice-cream with fluffo and sprinkles. My Moose are only (occasionally) dirty on the ice. They are my 25 sweet, innocent, little hockey-warrior boyfriends who play hard (sometimes) and skip down the street holding hands and makin’ plans (for the forecheck and backcheck).

Yes, perfectly innocent…so when they misbehave (like Ryan Hillier) and run their mouths and say bad things to refs I cover my ears and say lalalalalalala….innocent. You know you are in the bizarro universe when Ryan is the one spewing vitriol and Mr. Marchand is grabbing at him to calm him down and attempting to be the voice of reason. If anyone is wondering why Ryan suddenly became an asshole (taking back-to-back penalties which resulted in the Eagles scoring back-to-back goals), look no further than that new contract with the Rangers - Damn I hate the Rangers.

I have recovered somewhat from my anger over the miscalled ‘no goal’ (by Pridham) and goaltender interference (on MacMillan). I am normally all for goaltender interference calls, I do not condone the abuse of goalies – but this was not purposeful interference. I do, however promote the abuse of forwards by goalies – how else are they to express their frustration? Olivier Roy is a little ball of rage – you can just see it. He looks like he wants to explode. It is all in the way he throws the puck after he has caught it and wee tiny things about his body language. Was he frustrated on Saturday? I would say so. He made some great saves (hello, he made a glove save while lying on his back – it doesn’t get more awesome than that), but there were a few that slipped in, and it is these goals that induce rage. We should be looking into ways to use his youthful rageahol to our advantage.

It is not that the Eagles were not also disadvantaged by the Refs, I just wish the game could run a little more smoothly. Sometimes the refs seem to make it all about them. Now while I wish the game really was all about me, and the refs wish the game was all about them, truth be told it is not. In the tra-la-la fantasy world that exists in my brain it is all about me and my 25 little innocent little boyfriends who aim to please and do my bidding (and they hear me when I yell “keep an eye on Joey Haddad”). In my fantasy world goalies stop pucks just to impress me and they slash at annoying forwards in an attempt to win my love…but in reality it just ain’t so.

In a ref’s fantasy world we are watching them, when in reality I only see them when they get in the way. Sure they are there to prevent all-out wars, and we need someone to call offsides, but they sometimes meddle too much and treat the boys a little too rough. I have seen situations on the ice which, if I were in them I would probably tell the ref off too, and then I would get a stupid unsportsman-like penalty. I am one of those calm, smile, calm, calm, calm, smile - snap - batshit insane type of people.

Power IS fun, but as supposed grown-ups (I know I am a grown up because the boys at the grocery store call me ma'am and no one asks me for ID at the liquor store anymore) we should know better than to abuse it. This is why boys are for looking at, not touching. So dear refs, let the boys play their little game - look but don't always call.

Yeti - tell Pier to shave that weird attempt at a chin strap. It is gross and patchy and ruins his otherwise perfect, pristine, gorgeous, soft, pretty, pretty, pretty looking face. His ability to grow hair on his face does not appear to have improved since his early days with the Volts when he was holding hands and skipping down the streets of Drummondville with Latendresse and Brassard. How am I supposed to manhandle that pretty face when it has hair all over it? I am hereby officially volunteering to shave him if he has somehow forgotten how to shave. Tell him that he does not need a playoff beard when he is riding the pine... even if he is still theoretically in the game and he can see a play unfolding which causes him to stand up and shout out to y'all on the ice.
ps. Touching is allowed in this case because he turns 21 this week.

I must apologize to my sweet Yeti. I watched the Sea Dogs vs Titan (game 1) and I saw Fully’s assist and it was no big deal. He was behind the net handling the puck when he handed it off and the Dogs made a fancy, fast drive to the net for a goal. Travis did have many more puck playing adventures during the game, but his assist was nothing to get excited about, no panties went flying (at that moment). At some point Fully also misplayed the puck and put himself in a dangerous situation, which fortunately the Titan were not able to capitalize on. So darling Yeti, you can take all the time in the world to develop you puck handling, better safe than sorry.

Is Mr. Fullerton still capable of making me all hot and sweaty? - sure - but it was mostly because I was on the exercise bike while watching the game.

Travis was full of post-to-post toe-stops (mmmm stretchy) and other slick ‘robbing boys in the crease’ moves - and they did not even know that he was robbing them. At some point the Titan thought they had a goal and Fully dismissed them knowing that it was impossible because he was up skating around with the puck in his glove. So confident and delicious. There was no trapper changing shenanigans followed by goals and angry trapper throwing/ slashing and more trapper changing (see game 2 vs PEI). Apart from a puck which Travis let slip in through the five hole and his misplaying of the puck, there were no other nasty incidents to report.

Sometimes Champion looked great, he would have looked greater had he made that glove save on the Dogs third goal while he was knocked down on his ass. At other times he barely moved. I wonder if he is starting to wear down?

Jonathan Bernier’s (of the Lewiston MAINEiacs) season is not yet done. Jon has been called up to the Manchester Monarchs, and will be minding their nets as they start their playoff run (who feels bad for their regular goalies – sucks to be usurped). Now that Jon is playing with the big boys he has to be more careful about the waterworks. Let’s just hope there are no tears when the Monarchs are out of their playoff run, I suspect he will be less emotionally invested.

Awww he already has a team picture. It is old - It looks like it was taken about the time of the draft (2006). His hair has the frosted tips thing going on. Carey price had that hair once too. Dear goalies…highlights are for girls. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

I am handing out firm pettings and a can of redbull to Squirrels Giroux and the Gatineau Olympiques, who are currently up 2 games to 0 over the Quebec Remparts. When does poppa Roy get back on the bench? Soon I think… I have lost track of time. Let’s hope the tide does not turn for the ‘piques following a trip to Quebec city and the return of Patrick Roy.

The biggest shock in this second round continues to be Rimouski and the Rouyn-Noranda Huskies. Sure the Huskies are leading the series 2-0 but both games went into overtime and the series will be moving back to Rimouski. I expect that if the Oceanic continue to play as they have played of late, they should be able to take at least one, if not two games at home. Now that I have made predictions I have probably just completely and utterly killed their chances of a win.

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In the NHL- things couldn’t have gone better yesterday. Kisses (with tongue) to Biron for shutting out the Penguins. This leaves Montreal as the top seed in the east. Kisses to all of les Canadiens, plus a severe and thorough nuzzling to their young netminders for all of their wins and sexy shutouts. You guys were hot this year.

Last but not least - the NJ Devils FINALLY defeated the Rangers (in a shootout – but I am just happy with a win) thus earning themselves home ice advantage for the playoffs. This means very little if this year’s record against the Rangers continues to hold strong in the playoffs. If the Rangers keep it up the Devils will be home crying in their pillows after 4-5 games. I hate the Rangers.

Happy 20th birthday Bobby Nadeau...here is your public humiliation.

I love how the Q constantly fucks up the details on things.

Lengthy suspensions have been handed out to Remparts players:

• Jonathan Roy gets a 7 game suspension (bring on Audette) for his attack on Bobby Nadeau and for flipping off the Chicoutimi fans.
• Maxime Lacroix gets 3 games for hittin' a bitch while he is down
• Marc-Olivier Vallerand also gets two games for looking innocent but acting like a jerk.

and Sags players:

• Sébastien Rioux is out for 6 games for the ultimate sin - leaving the penalty box and getting back into the fight to attack baby Roy.
• Antoine Roussel gets a one game suspension for instigating
• Charles-Antoine Messier gets two games

and both of the coaches were suspended too. Fines abound.

...but here is the catch - according to the Q website they say

" Quebec Remparts goaltender Jonathan Roy is suspended seven games and receives a $500 fine for his assault on the opposing goaltender, Ryan Mior, as well as for the inappropriate gestures which he aimed at the crowd at the Georges-Vézina Centre during last Saturday’s game."

...but baby Roy did not attack Ryan Mior, he went after Bobby Nadeau. HELLO Q, am I the only one with this obsessive knowledge of your goalies...there are not that many to keep track of (not even if you count ALL the goalies for the Titan)...so why can't you keep track of them.

Now this reference to a hit on Mior is more like it, if you had actually identified it as being a hit on Mior:

"Shawinigan Cataractes winger Tommy Tremblay is hit with a six-game suspension for a bodycheck he administered to the opposing goaltender during last Saturday night’s game. "

While both Ryan and Bobby are 20, both are good little goalies, and both are reasonably attractive - they are not the same man. Dear Q - please remember that this is Ryan Mior and this is Bobby Nadeau. If it helps - Ryan is the heavier one with the funny Newf accent and with the little squirrel friend who plays for Gatineau, and Bobby is the French one in Chicoutimi. Is it clear yet?

But don't worry, that beatdown was just baby Roy's way of saying happy 20th birthday Bobby Nadeau. Yeah, Bobby turned 20 just this past Sunday. Why do birthdays always suck like that - "I turned 20 and for my birthday I get to sit idly by as the whole world watches me get beaten up by Patrick Roy's kid." Poor Bobby Nadeau.

I will kiss you better Mr. Nadeau. If you get traded to Halifax next year as a 20 year old I can give you those kisses and we can totally make you suck your way to oblivion. Do you want to end your Jr career on a low note - then come to Halifax - WE BREAK GOALIES.

Some other things to point out:
Olivier Roy (the good goalie with the surname of Roy who plays for the Eagles) had his very first playoff shutout this past weekend when the Eagles faced the Lewiston MAINEiacs. In all the fuss about the MAINEiacs losing 2 of 2, getting shut out, and Jonathan Bernier getting no assistance from his boys while simultaneously being stymied by his own evil moustache - I forgot about the Super Boy doing all that shutting out. This is Olivier's 5th shutout this season. He ended the season with a 2.87 GAA, the 7th best in the league, which is totally awesome for a rookie. Olivier has also just won the Raymond-Lagacé Trophy as the League’s top defensive rookie.


Saint John vs PEI - Game 1:
You are next Fully...I have so much to say about your first playoff game because you were rusty as hell in the first and second. I think I saw only one fancy save, and that was in the third - thank the Hockey Gods that you were able to pull up your socks if for no other reason than for 'looking smooth' and impressing me. They totally should have played you in the game against Halifax to prevent rust. Now scuddle over here in that cute little way that you scuddle across the crease...we have to talk. Why did Robert Mayer dye his hair back to blond leaving you and Passingham to look like the only freaks on your team with black hair? Will Passy fold too? It is time to disown Mayer from your goalie friend circle? What a traitor!!! Moose have black hair - you can join our team. However be forewarned - you might lose your power and start to suck...it always helps your confidence when we boo you as the people of Halifax often do. Junior goalies shouldn't let in soft goals, it's not like this is a development league or anything. Do you want a healthy dose of Booooooooo?

What, they don't booo you in Saint John? They treat you well even when you play poorly? They say thank you Fully, they say thank you for trying? They even thank Mayer when he loses...they thank him for trying? Passy too? Wow, Saint John are so sweet.

I will see you tonight . rowwwwrrr.

Oh and while you are in PEI tell 'big pimpin' Lafleur that he looked pretty good in the first, sharp even despite the two goals. He actually looked better than you....and did I see a little touch of goalie rage, an unpenalized slash on one of your Dogs. Ohhh Lafleur is scrappy. Then kick him for me since he is the one who ran Ryan Mior out of town.

Pier-Olivier Pelletier:
I actually wish I had something to say to you, but I have nothing because you are not playing...you are just sitting on the bench looking pretty. Sometimes I look at you on the bench and I sigh because you are pretty, but I would really prefer that you had your little mask on and that you were standing in some blue paint. Sigh.

Today my girl C.G. said that you were not the prettiest thing on the earth and that I should get over it - so I had to think about that one for a second. I thought of my boyfriend, and my ex-boyfriends; I thought of some actors, some singers, some other boys I have met in my life, and then I thought of some hockey players: Vermette, Fisher, Theodore, Brodeur, Pretty Ricky, Price, Latendresse. hmmmmm. My conclusion: yep, you are indeed the prettiest boy I have ever laid my eyes on in my whole life. Sigh. How can you live with such immense levels of pretty? Now how is that for a confidence booster!!! Thank you for letting me know you exist and for making the world a prettier place. Sigh.

Things are mostly as expected

When it comes to the games of Saturday Feb 23, pretty much everyone who was expected to win actually did win. The one exception being that PEI managed to make Cape Breton cry, and Olivier Roy was pulled from nets after allowing 3 goals in 11 shots. All hot streaks must eventually come to an end. PEI went on to win the game 4-3, with Marc-Antoine Gelinas turning away 37 of 40 shots.

In the Telus Division, the Quebec Remparts faced the Baie-Comeau Drakkar. The game started with both back-up goalies in nets: Jonathan Roy for Quebec and Mathieu Leclair for Baie-Comeau. However, some weird reversal of fortune had both teams benching their back-ups - Leclair at 20:00 after allowing 2/6, followed shortly thereafter by Roy at 23:22 upon letting in 3/16. Daddy Roy must 'fear the Cousineau', and so he decided to bring out the big guns. Not that Desfossés fared much better, because in the last 36 minutes of game he let in 3 of 19 shots. As a result B-C came out with a glorious 6-3 victory, thus bringing them back into first place in the Telus division, and first overall in the league.

I did not watch the live feed, and I will not watch the archived footage of this game. That being said, I should probably not comment too much on this game or on the actual production of the goalies. Maybe the Quebec D was shit last night? I doubt B-C became an offensive powerhouse, and started snipin' like mad. But who knows? However, if anyone can dole out the appropriate spankings I am sure that person is Patrick Roy.

Olivier Bellavance-Roy - King of Boys

I hate to do this because of the ass whooping Cape Breton handed us on Thursday, but if there is one little goalie who needs to get his BIG props, that goalie is Olivier Roy.


Olivier is now officially the bestest little rookie-goalie our league has ever seen. Roy used his magical glove hand and other magical French goalie powers to stop 36 of 37 shots by the Moose on Thursday, then followed this up with a 38 save shut-out against PEI on Friday. This boy must know the voodoo well. This is his fourth shut-out of the season, thus allowing him to surpass our favorite towel-wearing motormouth Martin Biron (and on and on and on) who had three shut-outs with the Harfangs 1n 1994-95. Olivier Roy has the most shutouts by a rookie in the Q, EVER.

Roy has previously shut out Moncton on Oct 2, 2007 (stopping 20 shots), and Bathurst on Oct 5, 2007 (stopping 30 shots). Over a span of three games in October 2007, Roy kept the puck out of the net for a whopping 167min 51sec, and now stands at 4th place in the league's history of 'Longest streak without a goal (in the regular season)'. By doing so he has surpassed both Jose Theodore (he of the Hilton Herp) of the 1994-95 Hull Olympiques (154min21sec), and Roberto Luongo (he of the luxurious locks dipped in Crisco) of the 1997-98 Val-d'Or Foreurs (134min50sec). Roy has also shut-out the current league leader, the Rouyn-Noranda Huskies, on Feb 16, 2008 by stopping 21 shots.

Now, not only did Olivier Roy surpass the rookie shut-out lead on Friday night, but he also holds the league record for wins by a rookie. With 24 wins this season he has managed to transcend the former rookie milestone of 23 wins, which was set last season by Bedford's own Peter Delmas of the Lewiston MAINEiacs.

By now Olivier should be used to getting his props:
1) he is currently the QMJHL defensive player of the week for 2008-02-11 to 2008-02-17
2) he was also bestowed the QMJHL defensive player of the week, for the week of 2007-10-01 to 2007-10-07.
3) Olivier was the Q rookie player of the month for October 2007.
4) He also won the RDS Rookie excellence award for Dec, 18 2007.

If I had to guess I would say that he will also receive Defensive player of the week for his play this week. Oy...and how his stats have changed in just these past two weeks. Olivier is now ranked the second best goalie in the league with a GAA of 2.72 and a save % of 0.901.

Young ladies, start sharpening your talons and book a flight to Cape Breton. Hhmmmm, I wonder if he goes to my old high school? I don't think my younger cousins in Cape Breton are taking full advantage of their fortunate situation.

Q-girl say: "Me want whatever goalie scout the Eagles have".
In their short 10 year history the Cape Breton Screaming Eagles have also scouted and drafted Mark Andre-Fleury (meh - the kids like him), and Über hot Czech goalie Ondrej Pavelec (Atlanta). I know what you are thinking, you are thinking "but the Moose had Giguère and Leclaire". True...not too shabby.

Just in case you need to know: no he is not the son of St. Patrick. That honour is bestowed upon Jonathan Roy of daddy's Quebec Remparts. In 19 games played, Jon has a GAA of 3.79 and a save % of 0.869. He didn't get daddy's goalie gene and apparently daddy can't train him. We also can't say that his stats are due to the team playing in front of him, because the Remparts #1 goalie Kevin Desfossés currently has 2.85 GAA, and 0.911 save%. Maybe Jon will grow into being a better goalie. I like to think that a goalie is like a fine wine, they get better with age.