Show me your teeth

Big props go out to Peter Delmas who has been awarded the CHL goaltender of the week. There is no evidence of this yet from the CHL but the Q-files twitter feed tells me so.

Finally. The Proof.
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Matthew Wuest has written a new piece about my on-again-off-again imaginary forward boyfriend Jessyko Bernard. FYI, we are currently back on.

“I told myself I had to pick it up and give whatever I’ve got, skate harder, finish checks, do whatever I can,” he said.

The Mooseheads told their players in the off-season they wanted them in better physical shape, but Bernard didn’t impress them in that department upon arrival at camp.

After being benched, the six-foot-two Moncton native realized he needed to shape up or he’d be shipped out. 

He’s hoping to finish strong and certainly doesn’t have any plans of being yanked out of the lineup down the stretch.

“That’s always in the back of my mind,” Bernard said.

“I don’t want to be a healthy scratch again because it’s not fun. I have to give everything I’ve got every night.”


So what does it all mean? Well it means that by being "off" over Christmas my imaginary forward boyfriend did not have to buy me an imaginary X-mas gift or an imaginary birthday gift. Lucky him. To make it up to me he has to play his ass off every game from now until mid-April March*. So yeah, he gets to get away with being cheap but I am an easy girl to please.

There are two upcoming games against local teams PEI and Bathurst this weekend. These are not unwinnable games. All I want is for the boys to put their balls on the line.




*April pfffft. I am so bad with dates. I meant mid-March. If the team were playing until mid-april it would mean they signed over their souls to Satan.

gone dark

Yeah, sorry about that. At first I swore I would not blog until I had dealt with pressing real-life issues. Those were dealt with by last Wednesday so I really have no excuse for not blogging about the last two games in a timely manner. Needless to say, not having to write anything for a whole week was like a dreamy dream. Fuck the English language.

So, I guess I should get to it.

Mooseheads vs Montreal Jr (Moose lose 4-1)
Well, the first period was exciting. When the team allowed 4 goals in the second period I gave up on life. Sitting through the third period just felt like torture because of the sense of complete helplessness. It must be how my cat feels when I force her to cuddle me. I never want to experience that again. Can you do that for me my sweet, darling mooselets?

Cookies to Grant for the only goal in what felt like the longest stretch of goallessness in the history of hockey.  Cookies are for eating, not for hiding in your underware.


Mooseheads vs Screagles (Moose lose 2-0)
Despite the fact that the team were shutout, this game was decidedly less painful. Games against the Screagles are always delightful and scrappy...even when there is no actual scrapping. Cookies are to be shared between Bety and Bernard for coming out in this game with full force, and new goalie Delmas for decreasing my sense of hopelessness with his >0.9% sv%. There is a chance for you yet Delmas, but remember: cookies are for eating, not for hiding down your pants.

PS J.Bernard. We are soooo back on. I was going to give you a choice about it but then I realized we never talked...so how could you let me know? You can't!!! I have made an executive decision for us. If I catch you sexy dancing for Alex MacDonald I will rip his mullet weave out...unless, of course, I can have you both.

Mooseheads vs Wildcats (Moose lose 3-0)
In a homage to the loss of Baby LBD I did not pay attention to this game. How dare LBD leave me to go to Quebec? The only benefit of this move was our acquisition of Delmas...Oh, and the fact that LBD gets to work with Roy. I just don't think he was taking my feeling into consideration. ...and to think that I cooed for his wearing of white belts and shoes (yes, gentle readers, he goes all Frenchy style on us too). 

Twenty-five shots on goal and yet, nothing. I blame Nicola Riopel. He probably shouldn't be in this league.

Cookies go to me because I have a tendency to drown my sorrows in food.

Mooseheads vs Sagueneens (Moose win 5-1)
Ah now that is more like it. Randall's one timer was a thing of pure beauty. Who knew that anybody on this team could 'one-time' it. Sometimes, as a group of intelligent, deep thinking and gentle boys, my moosies spend far too much time coddling the puck with their stick and contemplating their next move. Pucks are for shooting, not for coddling... and definitely not for putting down your pants in an attempt to look like you have a bigger schlong.

Pucks were getting all up in the Sags' net. The Mooseheads had 5 goals (Randell, Bernard, Gelinas, MacDonald and Andrews) in 40 shots and boys were driving the net to get those rebounds.  Amazeballs. Why can't they do this every night?

It's as easy as that!

With the Sags came a return to winning and the second coming of Alexis Piette (the first, of course, being his visit with the Lewiston Maineiacs before being traded to the Sags at X-mas). At some point Alexis played an excellent game of keep-away, scooting around the entire perimeter of our zone with the puck, and at that moment I desperately wanted him back. It's not just for the eyebrows.

Cookies go to MacDonald and Bernard. MacDonald had his first goal as a Moosehead, which is always something to be celebrated with abundant overeating and a few beer. Of course I am terribly selfish and I demand more goals. Immediately if possible. Yes Jessyko, cookies are for storing in your pants but only if I can...

Mooseheads vs Voltigeurs (Moose win 2-1)
Bitches. The Volts stole Delmas' shutout with just over 3 minutes left in the game. Peter Delmas stopped 35 shots on his way to a win over the league powerhouse Drummondville Voltigeurs (33-13-0-2). It was brilliant.

Abeltshauser (big slapshot from the point) and Amyot both got their goals on the powerplay. Knotek, Bernard, Gelinas and Andrews had assists.

Jake Allen was in nets for the Volts, playing what was his 3rd game in  a row. Why they felt the need to play him against one of the worst teams in the league is beyond me? I was tempted to throw Allan off his game by holding up a big sign that just said "SILVER" on it, but I had no bristle board and I had not thought of this in advance of the game. It turns out that it was not necessary to be so mean and the Mooseheads could defeat the Volts without my help.

To say that the final three minutes was stressful is an understatement. The Moose had lost their 2 goal cushion and spent the last minute playing 6-4 after taking a penalty for too many men on the ice. The defensive effort was staggering and I was desperately hoping one of the boys could thoroughly crush the Volts' spirits with an empty net goal but everyone knows that empty net goals are really not part of the Mooseheads' skill set.

Dear Peter Delmas,
Congratulations on your QMJHL defensive player of the week award. In two games you recorded two wins and had a 1.0 GAA and a 0.964 sv%.  I would lick cookie crumbs off your taint for that. Please, don't tell your mother I offered... and for God's* sake don't tell my mother either. What do you mean, you don't read my blog? You should get on that boy!
xxxooo
Q-girl

News links
Palov - Another upset win for Moose

Wuest - Mooseheads pull off major upset 

* God = Martin Brodeur 

Au revoir

Trades are the hardest. The QMJHL trade deadline day has come and gone and a few of the cuter Mooseheads have been moved as a result. Spencer Metcalfe is off to join Alex MacDonald on the Moncton Wildcats. What will I do with that fancy Metcalfe "hitman" shirt I designed for Zazzle. Guillaume Pelletier was not so lucky and he will be moving to the dreaded PEI Rocket *shudder*.

The Mooseheads have in return acquired 2 more native HRM boys (*sigh*, why does it always gotta be like that?). Peter Delmas was acquired from the Quebec Remparts for a 6th round pick. He will likely be taking over Joël Grodin's place in nets* (another hottie gone? - I shall miss his fluffy hair).  Forward Bradley MacDonald was acquired from PEI in the Pelletier trade. If I see him rocking Alex MacDonald's old #6 jersey I will be angry because 1) sacrilege, 2) that's a defencemen's number 3) dear Mooseheads stop being so fucking cheap and stop recycling old jerseys (Numbers). 

Speaking of fluffy hair: Mathieu Corbeil cut your hair! It is bordering on le cheveux dangereux.  If you don't have the money to get a hair cut because you spend all your 'Desjardins' on cloths from D2, then I will cut it for you. Free of charge.



Triple dumped by a goalie, a defenceman and a forward, a phone call from the tax people, having to see Mathieu's hair like that, and a computer virus - all in just two days.  It's gotta be all up from here. 


______________________________
* Grondin's demotion has been confirmed, as have a number of other player related movements

More little things

The Atlanta Thrashers have signed Angelo Esposito, formerly of the Quebec Remparts but currently assigned to play with the Jr de Montreal. Within minutes of the signing all pharmacies and beauty supply stores in Atlanta ran out of hair gel.

Hockey's Future has a Q&A with Colorado Avalanche prospect and Lewiston Maineiacs goaltender Peter Delmas.


The voting for the hottest Centreman in the NHL has begun. Check out the Hottie Hockey Dreamy Team at Wrap around Curl and I mean, We got guys... and vote. While you are there add some write in votes for Mike Fisher, who was sadly enough left off of their list. What? Is the world coming to an end? I think maybe it must be. Either that or Jenn and Heather have had their eyes gouged out with mellonballers. Now they have to wear eye patches - sexy.

Avalanche Development Camp

The Avs now own the souls of Kelsey Tessier (Quebec), Joel Chouinard (Victoriaville), and Peter Delmas (Lewiston). The boys do not appear to be crushed. Watch this video and decide for yourself.





Hmmm Delmas is looking good in video form, sadly I had to exclude him from my list of potential #1 QMJHL boyfriends because my list was already too big. So, while I know Lavigne is an unconventional choice, I did it for the poke-checks. I go weak in the knees for the ol' pokedy poke. That being said Peter still has a place in my heart, and maybe next year he can be my #1.