Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Who, shall I say, is calling?

I have been contemplating the last two games of the season and my potential goalie dates:

The friend - You never thought of him in that way because you have always just been friends. Your other friends keep telling you to go for it. He is kinda goofy and ‘the chemistry’ between the two of you is questionable. He is incapable of growing an actual beard, hair just grows on his neck. However he is a good listener and is often there for you when you feel abandoned. He is the one you call when you get stood up for a date. However he is not reliable when he is ‘in love’...then you can’t find him anywhere.

The sensitive guy – He is prone to tears and is described by others as a sensitive soul. He volunteers both his time and his money for charitable causes. He is traditionally handsome, dresses well but is not flashy, and because he is somewhat modest and soft spoken he blends in with the crowd. Your parents love him and your friends love him...heck everybody loves him. He is a prince and is soon to be a King. However, he is so consumed with work and with helping others that he sometimes forgets about you. You forgive him because everybody else thinks he is the one to hold on to. His work ethic and ability to climb his way out of a rut make him admirable. Your parents are probably right.

The smooth operator - He dresses well, his shoes and his belt always match. He smells good, his eyebrows are perfect, heck even his hands are perfect. No matter what the situation, he is extremely charming. He is so good looking your friends may try to sleep with him...as will your mother and every other female on the planet. This inspires immense jealousy on your part. He is sometimes cool, calm, and collected, but may occasionally come across as indifferent and cold. He has a temper when pushed. You never know which guy you are going to get. You wonder why he would even want to be with you….or even if he is actually still with you, because he is so unreliable. When he smiles at you, you forgive him because you are a sucker. He hasn't called you lately and yet you are eagerly awaiting his return and his smile. You like him a lot, maybe too much (which is why he gets two pictures). He frequently makes you feel like you have just been stabbed in the gut.

The bad boy - He has a temper, drinks (and drives), his cloths never match, his T- shirts have holes in them, he cuts his hair only once a year, and he looks like he has questionable hygiene. He may be crazy, but he is loads and loads of fun. You can dress him up but probably can't take him out - nor would you really want to. You are best served by just keeping him handcuffed to the posts or to the bed.

The foreign guy
– He is exotic because he is foreign, but then you learn that foreign guys are just like Canadian guys and they come with all the same baggage. He may be like any of the above guys, but until you get to know him better he is just - the foreign guy. He is pensive and careful with words, or maybe he just doesn’t like to talk. He keeps letting things slip by but refuses to discuss it with you when you ask about his day.

Your friend’s little brother - He likes you only because he had that ‘dream about you’. The fascination will wear off eventually. God, get your hand out of your pants Peter.

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