Of Moose and Men: Supercalipugilisticexpialidocious

Friday, November 13, 2009

Supercalipugilisticexpialidocious - Lucic Style

The Halifax Mooseheads face off against the Moncton Wildcats tonight at 7:00pm. My possible future goalie husband Baby LBD will be there. Not that I am currently seeking a replacement for Martin Brodeur, because Marty rocks and the Devils rock and everyone said the Devils would fail to rock this year and yet there they are - still rocking. It's kinda like how the Earth revolves around the sun. But anyway, I was talking about LBD...I'm just saying Marty can't play forever and the door is always open should he break into the NHL someday.

The Moose are rearing to go. Everyone is back to healthy, everyone of course being Jessyko Bernard (flu) and Alexandre Brunet (groin). There may be some issue with Cam Russell wanting to re-ice last weekend's winning team...a team which was lacking in guys named Jessyko Bernard and Alexandre Brunet. I say that while it is nice to reward players for doing well it is somewhat cruel to punish a player for being injured.

I personally would like to see if Jessyko has changed. Did the flu leave him with superpowers? Did he fight of the flu Lucic style. Was he pugnacious with the flu or did he just lay there and let the flu do him like a pretty lady. Furthermore, will he be a monster on the ice (Lucic style)? This is a question best answered 'in game'.

Is he still handsome? Is he still stylish? These are questioned better answered while wearing a suit and tie and wandering the concourse.

I am torn! Which Jessyko do I want? I think that Jessyko can play 'tougher' than he has been playing lately. Not Clarke and Metcalfe tough...just tougher than his last few games. I think that toughness and sensitive actually can exist in the same man - like Hugh Jackman. Fancy dancing can be held to intermissions and pre-game warm ups, and sexy-dancing (Lucic Style) can take place mid-game.

For now I want toughness. Can Jessyko be ridiculed into pulling out his balls and placing them firmly on the chins of the Moncton Wildcats?

Victim #2: Jessyko Bernard

What? You are my boyfriend and you thought you were going to get away without kisses and hearts? What kind of woman do you think I am?

Listen dude, just because we are on a break it doesn't mean that I can't still want to laugh at your dancing and get all jealous when I see some other girl wearing a game worn Bernard jersey. I was going to bid on your Vees jersey last year but I did not. You should ask your ex-goalie about all the things I did NOT spend that money on. I think it eventually went towards the purchase of some shoes.

Anyholygiganticpuppy, you are aware that when you hit people you should be leaving little corpses in your wake, right? I had considered the possibility of putting butterflies in your wake (I have been seeing more of those lately) but went with a more optimistic outcome. Flying corpses it is!

Saint Bernard! It has a 'Boondock Saints' kinda ring to it. You could be a mutherfuckin' gangsta on the ice...but lately you have been more puppy than beast. A puppy is great for cuddling but I am pretty sure that the other teams (like most women) want to be ravaged. If you can't score take their limbs as a reward - their limbs or their women.

What? You think no one besides me cares that you have been playing like this. It might start to cost you games. Dude, the world now knows. This is a word visitor map of the last 100 hits to my blog as of 8:00 pm last Tuesday night. Yes, they know.