Friday, February 27, 2009

This is the face of our enemy.

...and DAMN is it UGLY. Imagine growing up in Cape Breton. Imagine your options on the dating circuit. Are you shuddering yet? Well take a look at this:

Desveaux, Horyl, Shaw, McCarron, MacNeil, and Haddad
(Images from the
Cape Breton Screaming Eagles website
)

Oh my one eye - it burns. Had I stayed in Cape Breton, and had I chosen to mate with one of my own kind (literally, probably a second cousin or something) I could give birth to something akin to one of these monstrosities, then set him loose for the next generation of unfortunate Cape Breton girls to mate with.

Now admittedly I cut Cully out of here because he was just a little too shiny and he would offset the point that I am trying to make... the point being we are a fug, fug, fug people. That being said, I would probably be cooing at Nick MacNeil were he a Moosehead... but he is not.

Do ya wanna know what might make them look better? Plastic surgery. They probably can't afford it but if you hurt them enough so that it becomes a medical necessity then they can get it for free. Consider it a gift from the mainland. No, thank you Capers!


News links concerning Yesterday's game:

Willy Palov - Big win for Moose
"We feel like it’s playoffs (already)," said Mooseheads forward Gabriel Desjardins. "It feels like we should be (growing) moustaches or something like that that you do in playoffs. But we’re all playing together right now and there’s really good (chemistry) on the team."
I can see Gabe now, scavenging the floor for stray hairs and affixing them to his upper lip with crazy glue.

Matthew Wuest - Crucial Victory keeps Mooseheads in the race
“That’s what we need,” said winger Eric Louis-Seize. “We need to have the kill-or-be-killed mentality right now.”
Yes...please kill Cape Breton.

1 comment:

Jennifer Hammer said...

top left looks like an unattractive version of AMS captain Taylor Procyshen.

And Gabe would totally have to pick up hair scraps off the floor. Poor kitten with no facial hair. RAWR.