Draft Day Round 1

1.Moncton – Brandon Gormley

2. Drummondville – Sean Couturier

3. Victoriaville – Brandon Hynes – he is a tiny basket of puppies but there may be a Labrador retriever, a huskie, and I definitely see a Newfoundland puppy in there. Mmmmm newf

4. Val d’Or – Cedrick Henley – big puppy.

5. PEI - Ben Duffy

Trade – the Gouge and Piche from Rouyn–Noranda to Rimouski for Benoit Gervais – DUMB Riki. No Whitey for you.

The camera has been focusing in on the trade table. Roy has been making sexy faces at Vincent. Are they bedfellows? The Montreal Junior get Angelo Esposito in a trade which sees Jean-Simon Allard going to the Quebec Remparts.

I’m confused. This announcer sucks.

6. Lewiston – Garrett Clark – will he report

7. Shawinigan – Michael Bournival – oh he looks daft but also spriggin and French. I like the new Shawinigan jersey.

8. Montreal – Guillaume Asselin – boy can’t work a hat. Knows one word - "incredible", but he says it with a French accent which makes it cute.

9. Lewiston – Michael Chaput, brother of Stephan Chaput from Lewiston

10. Quebec – Samuel Carrier – he is all worlds of French.

You just know that Patrick Roy loves the Sydney skanks. He looks so smug - there is no possible way he hasn’t been up to something shifty and sexy while he is in Sydney. Imagine how much tail he picks up at Smooth Hermans. Yeah, he has been known to frequent the bars when he is in town. Then all of our skanky Cape Breton friends make cell phone calls to Halifax and squee into our ears about St Patrick being at the bar, and then they run off and do their thing. A skanks gotta do what a skanks gotta do.

Trade - Bathurst and Shawinigan do a trade for picks

11. Bathurst - Vincent Arseneau

12. Cape Breton – Deano, Fergus and Sheppard are there - Shep is adorable and scruffy. The older boys are exciting me, when it should be the young boys getting me excited today. Culligan is announced as the new captain of the Eagles, and they let Cully announce their pick. They take local boy Logan Shaw, which is way off the draft predictions.

Now Eastlink is interviewing James Sheppard. He has great skin, but seriously greasy hockey hair. Ahhh the NHL has taught him how to look like a greasy hockey player. That’s why he gets the big bucks now. The new draft picks are fluffy, the NHL players greasy. Is it a gradual change or a sudden one? Kerplunk. I am glad that Pier remained fluffy, except for a strange period around draft time. He entered the draft in a fluffy haired state but by ‘meet the draftees’ day his hair was all slicked down. Luckily it was only a phase; unfortunately so was having his rights held by an NHL team. I cry daily because nobody wants my sweet Pier. Won’t somebody please take my sweet P-O and pay him to stand there while someone belts frozen pucks at him. It would make us both very happy.

Trade - The Moncton Wildcats are making a trade with Rouyn-Noranda

13. Moncton – Louis Boileau-Domingue – a goalie – a pouty, toothy, tall, slim, cute French goalie. Hooray for me - a new baby goalie to watch. Apparently his sister dates current Moncton Wildcats goalie Nicola Riopel.

14. Lewiston – Etienne Brodeur.

15. Val d’Or –Alex Noel - has EXTREME eyebrow power, Maxime Sauve levels of eyebrow power. What is more exciting than making it into the Q is getting into my eyebrow club.

16. Gatineau – Yoan Pinette ranked # 90 but went at #16. That is way off the board.

The Cape Breton fans are thanking the Olympiques for beating my team. Hey, I love and appreciate your Eagles, why can’t we all just get along. Gatineau’s new jersey is rocking the Orange, Yoan is rocking the gold tie– it is a colour match made in hell.

17. Bathurst - Stefan Fournier

18. Drummondville – Jerome LeDuc – he looks like a baby…because he is.

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I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT HALIFAX’s PICKS NOW!!! Whaaaaa

Actually since we did not get a high first round pick I do not think we will be moving anybody for a second round pick, and when I say anybody I mean Whitey. Also, since picks have been way off the board, many first round guys have moved down and are available in the second, so Halifax might not be panicking. I wish the draft would air on TV for longer

Ugh now Wuest is reporting this –

“The Mooseheads made a pitch to acquire an earlier pick to grab defenceman Garrett Clarke, but the Lewiston Maineiacs won those sweepstakes and drafted him at No. 6. Clarke was ranked fifth by Central Scouting.”

Fuck off Moose – you would trade White or Logan only to get a guy who may not report and whose rights you could not trade for later because he could change his mind again and go NCAA. When I saw that Lewiston drafted him at 6^th overall I thought – that seems like some dumb ass thing Halifax would do – well fuck me with the butt end of a goalie stick – you are way too fucking predictable Mr. Patenaude.

From Wuest:

“The Halifax Mooseheads make their first pick of the draft at 24th overall. They select from Montreal midget AAA Gabriel Desjardins, a 5-foot-11, 187-pound forward.”

Yeah – they gots me a French kid. Thanks Santa Patenaude. He plays on the same team as our baby goalie MCT. How he is at playing hockey - I have no idea, but he better damn well be worth the pick.

I will report back later with a full list of our picks and I will be keeping an eye on Wuest’s live blog. FUN.