Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Olympiques vs Rouyn-Noranda Game 3: the doughnut game

Oh My. The Gatineau Olympiques were at it again. If the Moose thought we did poorly in Gatineau’s barn at least we can say we did not get a load of double digits to the face. The Olympiques defeated the Rouyn-Noranda Huskies 10-4 and now lead the series 2-1 heading into a second home game at the Centre Robert-Guertin.


I have been such a bum this week. Getting dumped is no fun. I have been drunk dialing my Mooseheads boyfriends at 2:00am and yelling at them. Then I ask them to take me back. Then I yell some more, then I hang up. Drink and repeat. I swear I can hear another girl in the background, giggling, mocking me, calling me pitiful. I will have no more of it. I knew I had hit my low when I had no sleep on Sunday night, and then on Monday I had poutine for lunch with a Boston-cream donut chaser. I desperately need a haircut, I haven’t exercised since the Seadogs were booted and I have had the worst drunken headaches.


I must thank IPB for a swift kick in the ass. In an attempt to counteract my slum, I dug out my playoff goggles, put them on and actually watched the game last night to help get me out of the QMJHL stupor I have been in since losing my team. Mind you, prior to the start of the game I had two martinis. This was followed by my typical exercise routine...albeit a slightly more drunken version. It is all so pitiful, especially since I was watching hockey in French, a language I barely understand.

I have to get ready to get back on the scene – Canada has called and I have accepted a date for May 12th. It is going to be fab.


If Byron (#20) was a kick in the shins to the Mooseheads, then for all intents and purposes he is the Huskies' poutine and Boston-cream donut. I wonder if they are left with any self esteem at all after that game. Last night Paul Byron had 4 goals, 2 assists, no penalty minutes, and finished the game a +4. If 3 goals is a hat trick, what is this quadfecta? What should we throw? Not panties - I reserve throwing my panties for goalies. Throwing him a copy of “What’s going on down there?” seems perfectly appropriate. This wee Byron kid is blowing my mind – I don’t know how he does it – at least two of those goals were break away goals. Is he so light and feathery that even the breathing of the defenseman chasing behind him is enough to propel him forwards? He is made of 99% pure hydrogen with just a touch of the Ether all wrapped in a fleshy coating. That’s 32076 moles of hydrogen…and still I am forced to ask - why is nobody trying to break Byron?

Buffalo drafted Byron because they wanted to make Ryan Miller feel fat.


Giroux received 4 more points in the form of 2 goals and 2 assists. All in all, the ‘piques racked up 29 points this game. If you look at overall playoff stats for this season, look up, way up, you can see Giroux at the top with 46 points (15, goals, 31 assists), followed at 27 points by Byron (20 goals, 7 assists) and Prokop (2 goals, 25 assists).

Philly drafted Claude Giroux because they wanted a Danny Briere. Then they went out and bought Danny Briere. Now they have two.


Also, why was Gougeon not pulled after the first 5 goals (all scored in the first period on 14 shots)? It left me thinking – “does this team have so little faith in Pucholt that they will not even try him in nets”? I got my answer in the final minutes of the third when Pucholt allowed 2 goals on 6 shots in 15 minutes. You could tell Rouyn were back to playing desperate hockey, since they were back to taking stupid penalties, and even went so far as to run Mior in the third, possibly in an attempt to phase him for game 4 (just as Shawinigan had done in round one). Not that Mior was fantastic, he allowed 4 goals on 22 shots, but he did make a nice stretchy pad save, and he also did something else exciting when I was not paying attention. Hey, I was drunk and exercising…how much attention span do you think I have? I ultimately blame the live Telus feeds and their lack of replays.


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I have been nagging my girlfriend about how she should know more QMJHL players from Cape Breton, if for no other reason than the fact that she is age appropriate and her boyfriend played hockey for years (although she refused to acknowledge this as she hates hockey). We already know about her encounters with BS, but I needed to know if she knows more boys so I started naming names. It turns out that one of her friends from school is Michael Kirkpatrick's sister, she remembers baby Kirky. The next time she goes to CB I am sending some cookies for him, as well as a certificate for his parents to sign which will allow for the transferring of all parental rights over to me.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad Playoff Goggles helped you in your time of need! Every hockey fan should have a pair behind a glass panel that reads "In Case of Emergency Break Glass and For Pete's Sake Put on the Goggles!!!"

Q-girl said...

Yeah, thanks for the playoff goggles. I should have had them after NJ lost - but I knew NJ were not making it past round one this year and I still had backups in Price + Marty's #2 and #3. So I was not that upset.

QMJHL-wise, I think they helped me pick a winner in the Olympiques, but by saying that I have probably just jinxed them.