Sunday, March 16, 2008

My daily breakfast bowl of Biron eyes

Yes I start every morning with a bowl of Biron eyes. Poor Marty #2. He has to regrow his eyes every morning. He also always starts a starter, but is always usurped. But Marty #2 is no longer in the Q, so I digress.

The Moose played the PEI rocket on Friday and I was pleasantly surprised that we got the game on Eastlink, which means no low resolution Telus feeds for me. Horray. As usual I was disappointed by the first two periods, but we managed to turn it up at the end to come out of the game
6-2. By doing so we have managed to clinch 1st seed in the East. So even if Saint John wins today so that we are tied in points, the Moose have more wins overall. By winning their game against Moncton, Saint John have secured second seed because they currently stand 3 points ahead of the Titan.

Here are the current standings and todays matchups:
Halifax - 89
Saint John - 87
Acadie-Bathurst - 84
Cape Breton - 84
Lewiston - 81
St. John's - 72
PEI - 62
Moncton - 56 (eliminated)

Halifax vs Saint John
PEI vs Moncton
Lewiston vs Cape Breton
Bathurst vs St. John

They are still fighting it out for first and last in the Telus - ohhh the suspense.

Bathurst and Cape Breton are in a desperate fight for 3rd in the East. I could throw out random guesses as to who is going to win, but such foolishness is for men. They sit there all day on their boards, "Lewiston wins 3-1 with 2 goals by Bundil"- shut up. Why even waste your fucking time? I use my imagination for greater things.

Halifax vs PEI:
I don't have much to say here. The 4th line still looks nice. Smith has been looking fresh since his return. He does what he was meant to do, be big and knock guys off the puck. What more do you want from your 4th liners? The people of Halifax want them to have different DNA, and if they get what they want all the boys would be from Halifax. The people of Halifax hate change, tall buildings and French boys.

I love French boys. I say load us up with French boys. Get me some more tall blond French boys, the Louis-Seize is not blond enough. Why don't the Moose have blond French boys? Maybe some Keven Charland and Keven Veilleux (-9, oh snap). Tee Hee they spell Kevin like Keven - weird. Now say something dirty in French. What, I will be gettin' me some Charland at 2:00 today? OK then. Did I just distract myself by letting the girl in me take over? - Stupid girl.

I was kinda wanting to see Lafleur. I have had an irrational hate on for Lafleur all year. It does not help that he was drafted by the Rangers. He also looks like he has wonk eye - I figured that his recent bout of suck was related to the fact that eyes that wonky just can't focus well enough to see the puck. However the Moose have been ODing on Gelinas, and may I be frank - Gelinas is dull. I watched Saint John vs PEI the other day and PEI played Lafleur, and I know that Lafleur has been stinking it up for the greater part of this year, but he was really fun to watch in that game. He does things with a dramatic flourish. Part of his problem could be that he fails to simplify? I don't know, I don't draft goalies, I can only rank them on who is fun to watch, and big ol' Lafleur was fun to watch. I am beginning to feel a little robbed. Also, Lafleur has the goalie rage thing going on - he received a penalty for slashing Yann Sauve in the back - dirty. I like it - slash the pretty defenseman.

Necessary Fully rant:
Travis Fullerton did not face many shots in his last game against Moncton, but he did come out the winner and so I threw more panties in his general direction. I was particularly impressed that it appeared as if he stopped pucks while laying on his back. I think the first nice stop, about 11 minutes into the game was a slide across the crease on his side which connected with his glove, so he was technically not on his back. I don't really care about technicalities, I prefer to think he was on his back.

Halifax vs Saint John
The men on the boards keep saying that Cam will start P-O. In my dreams. Does he have that kind of foresight to realize that you are not supposed to let your goalies rust up before the playoffs? I don't see it.

I am hoping for a low scoring game. Show those stupid forwards who is boss. Anyway, one of the goalies I love will be the goalie who loses. May I recommend that the losing goalie for today's game be turned over to me for some tough love. What is tough love? Well it depends on what goalie I am punishing. I had a little list of specific punishments prepared
but it makes me look even crazier than I already look, so I will refrain. But let me just ask: if I say I want to play Helen Keller with your face, would you get that? No, it's not meant to be dirty (for once), it could be dirty, I could make it dirty, but technically it is meant to be a fairly innocent concept.

Punishment for a goalie would be forcing him to spend time with me. When I am done playing nice with my delicate little toy I will give him a slightly less chocolate-y cookie and pack him back into his box but I will use less bubble wrap than usual - because I am cruel like that.

NHL news

Brodeur gets his 40 wins for this season in a game against the Avs (and sexy STD laden Pixie Jose Theodore). This is Marty's 1 billionth season of 40 wins. My hockey hubby makes me so proud. I pick 'em good. NJ still lead the East, 1 pt up on Montreal and 3 pts ahead of Pittsburgh (who have a game in hand). I have already started warming up my jersey for the post season.

Goodbye for now to Pronger, his Pixie nose and his weird jaw device.

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