Monday, March 30, 2009

Monday updates: Throw your frilly unmentionables at the UNB VReds.

Ohhhh can I pick 'em or can I pick 'em. Despite losing the UAS men's hockey championships by 2 games to 1 against Saint Mary's University; the UNB Varsity reds were able to bring it all in the CIS finals and defeat the University of Western Ontario Mustangs by a score of 4-2.

Of course I was watching since 'my obsession' was in nets for the Reds. I have been oogling Fullerton for quite some time now. Half of my blog has this weird, eerie, creeped out, stalker-y vibe to it because of him. I can't help it... and now neither can anyone who watched the CIS finals.

One day they are firey pink cheeked QMJHL players (I'm looking at you Clendenning), the next they are calm headed studious University hockey boys
UNB VReds picture from the Daily Gleaner

Once you have seen him you can't unsee him. He gets into your brain and does those little goalie leg flicks at your hippocampus, thus damaging it. He does this until you forget everything you ever knew about the other goalies. Then he travels up to your amygdala and cups it with his trapper so that it feels the love and pokes your cerebellum with his stick to make you feel dizzy. Ahhhhhhh Fullerton.

Apparently he won some sort of prize, because I could hear his name called in the post game melee, but the camera crew were not covering it. They were just tracking Lachlan MacIntosh (who had a hat trick and was named tournament MVP) around the arena. Checking the Daily Gleaner today I discovered that Fullerton was named to the tournament all star team. Rawrs for Fullerton.

Now aren't we all glad that he did not hang up his skates after his disasterous first two regular season games with the VReds? Not bad for a guy who did not even play enough minutes during the regular season to qualify for the league all stars team.

Despite all my cooing and general cougaring (or perhaps puma-ing), one real question has yet to be addressed: To what address do I mail my bra?


edit: Ackkkkk INTERVIEWS INTERVIEWS
edit 2: an older (March 26th) Fullerton related news article in the Telegraph Journal

3 comments:

eyebleaf said...

Getting a bra in the mail has got to a wonderful experience.

Anonymous said...

How can you have any respect for Fullerton? Tell me? The kid went to UNB, the bane of my CIS hockey world. I'm sure he was sexy sweet and all that crap in Junior but now he is just a Squirrel in goaltender equipment. Why waste your time on a rodent....a tree rat...your better than this.

I really don't want to email Marty and tell him of your sick perversions but I will if you force me. Considering that Marty is, simply put (just ask his sister-in-law), the best goalie ever, I know he would put you in your place about TF. He would tell you that Squirrels don't have feelings and that there are other mammals out there that would be a much better use of your time to coo over.

Is there any way to rationalize with you? Please for your own mental health, break it off now before you go out on a limb and he pushes you right out of the tree. No acorns for you!!

Q-girl said...

Marty is a glass of well aged wine and Fullerton is a bucket of tequila. I acknowledge this. Marty is a sensitive lovahhhhh while Fullerton is merely a fuckbuddy (all in my dreams of course).

Should Fullerton push me out of a tree (just like he deleted me from his facebook) I still wouldn't mind. My boyfriend doesn't even mind. Why? Because it could be worse...it could be Yetman.

Furthermore, squirrels are super adorable ... and they bite when you least expect it. Yowza, kinky.