Thursday, February 28, 2008

Dear Fully - Get it Together

I am waiting with bated breath for our next date - March 16, 2008. Remember? Yeah, I knew you wouldn't forget. Our dates are always blissfully explosive. You must remain strong. It will be a very important date for all of us as it may be the deciding game for the #1 position in the east.

You do not want Mayer walking into our barn and stealing my heart now do you? No, I didn't think so. This may be our last date my darling Mr. Fullerton - you are 20 and this is your last year in the Q. That being said, you had better slap your Dogs and pull up your damn socks, because I WILL NOT settle for a date with Mayer. If you wanna play that game/keep our date you had better start playing well NOW.

Someone please cover little Simon's delicate ears, this is about to get dirty. Done? -OK

The QMJHL will allow us to have only three dates this year and you know how frisky I get when I have to wait so long between our liaisons (rowwwrrr). The way you tug at your jersey during the game to give me a little peek at what lies underneath is naughty. The way you caress the posts - you are such a tease. I am seriously considering going home to CB just to watch you play back to back games there against the Eagles in early March. I need you so much it hurts. Sometimes I just don't get enough puck handling at home, and you are the boy who knows perfectly well how to fill that void.

Telus just isn't good enough for the Fully peepin'- and tonight it was crap- there was no audio. I had to put on the radio and the Telus feed simultaneously, but they were totally out of sync (video was lagging). I quit watching when you got the hook. No need for us both to suffer. What the hell went wrong? Were your eyes so swollen with tears from crying over me that you could not see the puck? Sometimes P-O has the same problem but he will never admit to it. I know it is hard for us to be this far apart, and to top it all off my 'goalie-assisting love-vibes' are only effective for a radius of about 500 miles (800 km). That means you are safe in eastern Quebec and Lewiston, but if you are in Nfld or in western Quebec then you are boned. Then, all you have to rely on is your Ds and your actual skill to win you games. Life is a total bitch for a goalie on the road. P-O learned this the hard way - look at the Moose's performance in Rouyn and Val d'Or.

I have a little secret - I tuned into Sportsnet for the Seadogs vs Voltigeurs game. Yeah, I fuck around on the Moose, but they have some little Quebecois tart on the side...fair is fair. I wish all of your games were broadcast on Sportsnet. I have seen you from behind the net, I have seen you from the top of the face-off circle in your zone, but on TV I got to see you from a whole different perspective. They had a camera above you - it was sweet. Not only that but I have digital cable - pause, play and rewind. Have you ever had an out of body experience and watched yourself from above? Le sigh. You have the cutest little way of moving across the crease on your knees. I am hooked.

Tips for future games:
Did you shave? You shouldn't do that - it is not lucky and the scruff totally works for you. The clean-shaven, crazy-eyed, crop-haired Fullerton with the wonky smile is hot, but scruffy-fluffy Fully totally drives the girls wild. Yeah, you're hot!!! Does that make you feel better? Go look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are hot. Remember, when you know that you are hot you will play like you are hot, so just keep staring back into your own baby blues and repeat after me "My name is Travis Fullerton and I am hot." Now, keep doing this until you play like you are hot.

tingling with anticipation

No comments: