Sunday, January 4, 2009

Have I told Jessyko lately, how I heart him?

I do... just know that. I am sorry that I cursed Patenaude to hell when he drafted my 'new puppy' in the 4th round instead of Noseworthy. How was I to know? I don't follow US prep-school hockey, or MJAHL hockey. Noseworthy had charmed me with his eyebrows. I have an extreme weakness for great eyebrows... and if those eyebrows are on goaltenders, defencemen or checking-line forwards, then all the better.

I was wrong. I now want to pet the puppy.


The game was awesome. It was an orgasmic loss, 6-5, but it was still totally awesome. I was like "Give cookies to"... Earle, no wait... make that Pender, no Piette, puppy?, no Yuri, maybe Gab, no Pender, wait wait... Eric uhhhhh yeah Eric it is.

There was a lot of oohing and ahhhhing and shouting yes yes, then no, then fuck me, then fuck Joey Haddad (never), then fuck Yetman. I say ohhhh (like Oh oh oh ohhhhh) a lot. Sometimes hockey renders me speechless.


The game:

Cape Breton opened up the scoring late in the first period, with a break away goal by Gauthier. I have no idea what Yetman was doing to stop him. The only logical explanation I can come up with is that he came out to challenge Gauthier, was beamed up by aliens, they realized this was not the one they want (it was supposed to be Tokarski) so they returned him...on his belly. It happened so fast we didn't even notice that he disappeared, then re-appeared, face down.

Team Canada Aside: If only the aliens had gotten Tokarski... and kept him, maybe probed him or something. Honestly, if you are going to be spending that much time on your knees things should be going in your mouth, not between your legs!!!

Chris Culligan scored only seconds later to bring the Eagles up 2-0. I was starting to get angry feelings toward my goalie.

However, Justin Pender then got the Moose up a goal on the power play, assisted by Piette and Cheremetiev. Pender was playing as a forward last night, on a line with Eric Louis-XVI, as well as playing his usual spot as a defenceman on the point in the PP. We don't have enough forwards: Knotek (World under 20s), Desjardins (under 17s), Stransky (suspension), and O'Brien (illness) are all out.

In the second period things really got rolling. Yuri Cheremetiev (likely not the best dressed guy on the team, meaning that MacDonald has bad taste... prob because he doesn't brush his teeth, it is all circular) tied it up early in the first, with assists by Dick Dastardly and Muttley (good puppy).

Hooray - tied. This will last forever and ever...'till we pull out a last minute win? No, Cape Breton then pulled ahead by two goals, finishing the period up 4-2, with goals by Chouinard and Meilleur. I could have swore I saw Joey Haddad bat in a high bouncing puck, but he gets no credit...so I guess that never happened.

The Moose came back in the third with goals by Dick Dastardly and Muttley. It is almost as if, should one of them be doing well, the other must follow suit. MacAskill and Bahm assisted on the Dastardly goal, and puppy's goal was a beautiful unassisted top shelfer, where he came in to the left of Roy and put it between Roy and the post to hit the top right hand side of the net (I think). Crazy angle. The fact that it was a tying goal made it even sweeter.

Then, in an attempt to ruin my night Gauthier (unassisted) responded for Cape Breton with only 5 minutes remaining in the game. Yeti deserved to be the one getting slapped around - don't ruin this on me boy.

...but then the Pièce de résistance. The cookie worthiest part of the game - Eric Louis-XVI made a hit behind the Cape Breton net, got the puck, passed it forward to line-mate Pender, who was waiting beside the net (Roy's left, and may I just point out, seemingly weaker side) and then tapped it in for the 5th and tying goal. I could have climbed over the glass and licked them both.... damn netting.

OT solved nothing, so onto the shootout we went. It was arggggggg. Gauthier (what is with that guy?) scored on Yetman, while Cheremetiev got the first shot for the Moose - but nothing was getting past Roy...especially since Cheremetiev hadn't tried any 'moves'. Dick Dastardly was also goal-less in the shootout. Haddad, put one past a sprawling Yetman. Eagles win.


Quick notes:

  • MacAskill made a nice neutral ice hit.
  • Hits were up, way up. Good= hits = energy= the kinda game I love.
  • Yuri had a breakaway chance but instead of driving the net he decided to go wide, thus allowing the Eagles defence to catch up to him. Mathematically, the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. Just go to the net.
  • Mark Yetman allowed 5 goals on 36 shots.
  • Olivier Roy allowed 5 on 42 shots
  • Our PP was meow - 3 in 5.
  • We dominated the faceoffs. One again Piette was a machine, winning 12 of 16.
  • I could complain and say why wasn't Greer playing forward intead of sitting, but hey.
  • Yuri has had 4 shootout chances this year, and no shoot-out goals - time to give someone else a chance. Pender was hot, so I would have gone with Bety, Bernard and Pender. Not that my opinion matters. If I made a team they would just be pretty, good at massaging my feet and willing to fetch me beer.
  • CB should stop running my goalie
  • Stars went to Gauthier (#3), Piette (#2), Culligan (#1)
  • Kevin Cormier was fan favorite #15
  • What is not cool - Metro Centre shoving the score of the Canada/Russia game down my throat. THAT is not what I want down my throat. I was TIVOing the game asshats. Way to ruin my life.
  • Clearly my pics are not from last night's game. Black is a good winter colour. I like the all black uniform. Damn they look good.

News Links:
Matthew Wuest - Lineups Screaming Eagles at Mooseheads
Matthew Wuest - Game notes, Screaming Eagles at Mooseheads
Willy Palov - Eagles win thriller

3 comments:

"Dave Schultz" said...

"If only the aliens had gotten Tokarski... and kept him, maybe probed him or something. Honestly, if you are going to be spending that much time on your knees things should be going in your mouth, not between your legs!!!"

Best quote ever.

Q-girl said...

Maybe Heather would disagree.

"Dave Schultz" said...

I'm sure she would.